Brilliant Bry *：歡樂吧！生命

Many have argued whether this is really a special day or it is simply a commercial campaign. Personally, 14th February had never been a special day for me. I was never in a love relationship on this day. But I would not mind watching all those TV commercials or business promotion in the shops. When you know that it might be simply a commercial campaign to create another high volume of sales in the beginning of a year, you would easily get out of those strange feelings that were actually created by the commercial atmosphere: if you are alone on this day, you are miserable.

No one is miserable being alone on any day of the year. So, why 14th February? Even if one is not alone on this date, that does not ensure his or her fortune for the rest of the year. I would rather believe that one’s fortune comes from the ability of being alone. An old teaching tells us that we cannot make anyone love us. All we can do is let ourselves be loved. And how would we start to let ourselves be loved? We simply love ourselves, and enjoy the time being alone with ourselves.

It’s cute that many of my friends had sent me a message of ‘Happy Valentine.’ And I am also sweet enough to send out messages of ‘Happy Valentine’ to my friends. It’s not about whether you have a lover or significant partner to share this day with. It’s more about how you connect with all your loving friends. Saying ‘Happy Valentine’ is also a way to appreciate the friendship you offer and receive along the road. When you love yourself, everybody will fall in love with you.

I had a chat earlier with some friends regarding the criteria for an ideal lover. Everyone has got some serious conditions about this. Some want their lovers to be handsome or beautiful. Some want theirs to be tall, strong, and fit. But one friend specifically wants her boyfriend to be able to knit. And all these years, many have argued that it is almost a mission impossible for guys. But it is not true. One only needs to put in some time and effort to learn, and he will eventually be able to knit. It’s not about the ability to knit, but about that to learn. You will always need to learn in a love relationship. And it’s much easier than criteria of height, weight, or even the hair or skin colour. Yet some criticise a request such as learning knitting irrational and relentless.

I watched a Hong Kong movie in which a viewpoint about love was expressed exaggeratedly. However, this request of love from the female leading role sounded ridiculous, but yet so true. It seemed as if she had demanded too much, but yet it was actually so little. It goes like this.

From this moment on, you can only love me. Spoil me. Do not lie to me. Realise all you have promised me. Tell me each word from your heart. Do not disrespect me or yell at me. Believe in me. When others disrespect me, you should stand out to support me. When I am happy, you are happy together with me. When I am unhappy, you have to cheer me up. Always think that I am the best. Dream about me when you sleep, put me in the place of your heart.

（從現在起，你只許疼我一個人。要寵壞我；不能騙我；答應我的每件事都要做到；對我講的每句話都是真心話；不許欺負我、罵我；要相信我。別人欺負我，你要第一時間出來挺我；我開心，你要陪著我開心；我不開心，你要哄我開心；永遠覺得我最好；夢裡要夢到我；在你心中只有我。）

Is this a lot to ask? I do not think so. As long as one has the sincerity to love, all those requests are done at once without any problems. I am afraid that those who argue these requests being ridiculous are actually the ridiculous about love. Because when you reflect that statement to the way you love yourself, it is actually how you would expect your lover to love you as you do. So, how difficult can it be!?

Happy Valentine’s Day on 14th February. ‘Happy Valentine’ every day throughout the year. Love yourself, and then everyone will love you. As for me, I guess soon someone will come along the way. But before that, I will be the perfect Valentine for myself. It’s gonna be (and it’s gotta be) sun shining all the way.